The oppressor becomes the oppressed, the oppressed becomes the oppressor. The cycle is never ending simply because of the urge of retaliation, to avenge, to come out on top. Body shaming

The picture of the ideal image of the human body is subjective and instantaneous in change, from needing to have a twiggy look, immaculate muscle or voluptuous curves. Since most of these qualities of what is considered perfect cannot naturally be obtained for the majority of people, people will pursue them without fail using any means. Drugs- legal and illegal, anorexia, bulimia, plastic surgery, steroids, et cetera.

We feel the constant need to fall into step with the standards of mainstream media. ”Flip through any women’s magazine, and there’s a good chance you’ll get the same underlying message: No matter what we do with our brains, hearts, or spirits, if we’re not also sexually desirable, we’ve failed,” said Jessi Kneeland, founder of Remodel Fitness.

The “perfect look” may be changing, but our bodies cannot keep up. “There’s this drumbeat that muscularity equals masculinity, and so we’re seeing more and more young men with muscle dysmorphia,” says Dr. Harrison Pope and, “The consequences of this kind of thinking can be dangerous. As more and more men hit the gym in the hopes of transforming themselves into The Rock, many are also turning to anabolic steroids to achieve the muscle mass they associate with masculinity. Up to 4 million Americans—nearly all of them male—have tried steroids at some point, according to Pope’s recent research,” reports Markham Heid, at People.com.

We have made progress, opting for loving ourselves instead of a processed ideal. Self love leads to taking care of ourselves emotionally, spiritually, physically, and mentally. We are focusing on making ourselves happy instead of everyone else. It’s all over Instagram, Snapchat, and Youtube, some accounts focusing on it entirely.

However, there are some who are lost on the meaning of self love and having confidence in themselves. They have taken in a “shoulders rolled back and chin up” attitude, which is lovely but they have also taken in that fear of losing that confidence. And as history proves, time and time again, when we feel in any way threatened, we instinctively strike out in retaliation, to make what or who we fear, share our fear. Instead they are tearing someone else to elevate their own confidence.  For example, sayings such as “real men” and “real women” want “something to hold onto,” “are not afraid express their feelings” or “don’t beg for attention” implying that if you do not act a certain way, follow the fad, you are no longer real. Like you have subsequently turned into someone else since you are not like almost everyone else who has. There is a difference between changing because you want to and changing because everyone else expects you to.

Modifying compliments is just as bad. It also contributes to the cycle. “You’re cute for a fat girl,” “Your look kind of anorexic but at least you have really good bone structure!” or, “Your voice sounds really feminine it makes you sound kinda gay, but it’s pretty though, I bet you can sing really well!” The add ons are not in any way okay. You may think you are being nice but you’re not. This the the equivalent of Mean Girl’s level of pettiness, and I would like to think we’ve made some progress since 2004.

The fact is, you may claim you are the epitome of self love but if you really loved yourself, you would not feel the need to tear someone down.